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#1324065
John
So why did it take so long for wood to evolve
It took plants time to evolve wood for the same reason it took plants time to evolve the ability to poison their caterpillar predators and the caterpillars time to evolve the ability to use that poison to kill their predators (wasps): first there's the necessity, then the invention. Only creationists insist, despite evidence to the contrary, that everything was made at the same time.
8/22/2011 6:55:01 AM
#1324067
Swede
Wood is just a very thick stem. Have you never seen a less-than-a-year-old maple or birch? They still have stems.
The first plants were very short, and a thin, short stem was enough to be higher than the competitors. Over the 15 million years since, the plants got taller and taller in the competition, and the stems got thicker and thicker. Some plants evolved more effective ways of using less sun, and stayed short below the foliage.
An eight-year-old, with the most rudimentary knowledge of ToE and a bit of imagination, could have explained this. How come you can't manage to understand it?
8/22/2011 7:00:41 AM
#1324071
The Jamo
Is he talking about wood or an erection?
8/22/2011 7:12:58 AM
#1324074
Alleyprowler
That is SO fucking random...
8/22/2011 7:16:16 AM
#1324077
LAchlan
Get on the phone to Dawkins right away. We've been found out. Now I need to get a suit for going to church. Dang!
8/22/2011 7:32:40 AM
#1324081
Panz
Ah, one of those "I've won because I think I'm smart by saying stupid things"
8/22/2011 7:52:32 AM
#1324082
Lucilius
Garvan, wood was created by Jehovah specifically so that one day your head could be made from it.
8/22/2011 7:54:04 AM
#1324083
SpukiKitty
Garvan Elison, can you explain why you're brain is made of wood?
(...really! Where do these people come from? Planet Zork?)
8/22/2011 7:55:06 AM
#1324087
Bollox
Nah, not buying it. I reckon Garvan is a Poe.
8/22/2011 8:09:13 AM
#1324089
Anon-e-moose
@SpukiKitty
"Garvan Elison, can you explain why you're brain is made of wood?"
So that when he goes swimming - like a duck - he floats?
A Witch! Burn him! [/"Monty Python and the Holy Grail"] X3
8/22/2011 8:11:12 AM
#1324092
Xotan
This is just too idiotic. where are the men in white coats when they are needed most?
I am really struggling hard not to say that Garvan can't get wood....
8/22/2011 8:13:49 AM
#1324098
Doctor Whom
Obvious (and dedicated) troll is obvious (and dedicated).
8/22/2011 8:26:55 AM
#1324109
Yownanymous
No-one's made a penis joke yet. I am disappoint.
8/22/2011 8:42:58 AM
#1324113
JohnTheAtheist
Actually trees are a very convincing proof of evolution because no one in their right mind would have created a tree. It is a model of inefficiency. Essentially all trees do is to raise "grasslands" to canopy height at huge expense of materials. If all plants could only "agree" to stay low they would all benefit...same amount of light, less used in the way of resources to get it.
Also, this just in, Garvan is an idiot.
8/22/2011 8:54:25 AM
#1324115
Moondog
Headdesk
8/22/2011 8:58:56 AM
#1324117
Nicole
Durrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrp! Hurp durp!
8/22/2011 9:07:37 AM
#1324119
Anon-e-moose
@Yownanymous
"No-one's made a penis joke yet. I am disappoint."
Ask, and yew shall receive:
I thought 'Got Wood' was someone obtaining combustible fuel, until I discovered Smirnoff.
http://forum.weebls-stuff.com/archive/index.php/t-18430.html
...oh, and never mind 'Son I am disappoint', I invented the 'ReiTree' meme in 4chan's /a/:
Some moss took a lichen to ReiTree.
ReiTree's best friend was a mushroom. He was a fungi to be with.
ReiTree had a dog, but she got rid of it. It kept her up all night with it's bark
Q: What is ReiTree's favourite recording artist?
A: Woody Guthrie.
Compared to ReiTree, I've always thought Shinji was a bit of a sap.
ReiTree gives me wood.
Yesterday I was having sex with ReiTree, but she told me to withdraw my woody. She was becoming saw.
ReiTree's vagina is pretty dry, but it felt just pine
She should make like a tree and leaf.
Her acting in NGE was rather wooden.
What if Rei was a lumberjack? She could use my chopper, if you know what I mean.
She was the reason why the series was axed.
In terms of sex, ReiTree provides instant grassification.
ReiTree has a sponsorship deal with Fly
Moe electric lawn tools.
Rei belongs to NERV. A grass-roots organisation.
...I'll get my coat.
X3
Gendo Ikari: 'Rei Ayanami puns? In MY FSTDT?! The NERV of those people! Will we EVA hear the last of them?!'
*gets up & starts to leaf*
...I'll get my coat.'
X3
8/22/2011 9:11:16 AM
#1324120
Oh come on, how has no one posted this yet?
8/22/2011 9:11:31 AM
#1324121
The phrasing of your last question betrays the lie in your first, Garvan. You know damn well why wood evolved. And probably have a rudimentary understanding of how. I'd imagine you also realise that the advantage conferred by height would not have been as great during the early evolution of plant life, at least not enough to make expending energy on forming truly woody stems a worthwhile endeavour.
I have a question for you Garvan: if the Earth is young and special creation is true, why do you and others like you need to lie in order to persuade your followers you are right? Why does it require wilful ignorance and cognitive dissonance to maintain a belief in the Genesis account?
8/22/2011 9:12:08 AM
#1324123
Papabear
Please supply your own sex joke here.
"FACT: Plants are made of leaves and stems and do not contain any wood."
Some plants have wood... as do some heads, apparently.
8/22/2011 9:18:23 AM
#1324127
Berny
The Garvantard really needs to learn how to use Google. Three seconds and he would have found his answer.
8/22/2011 9:59:04 AM
#1324131
Osiris
Because adaptations like that don't magically appear over night. It took millions of years for wood to evolve because evolution is really slow and the phrasing of your question betrays your ignorance of that fact. Unlike your fairy tale there was never a single "moment" when plants first "appeared". It's not like one night there were no plants and then the sun rose the next morning and suddenly there they were. You're looking at a process of possibly billions of years as single-celled photosynthetic species came together in groups, and those groups became colonies, and then those colonies became organisms.
8/22/2011 10:42:11 AM
#1324132
cdcdrr
Well you see, when two people love eachother very much they perform a special hug, which works best when the man's pee-pee is stiff and long, instead of weak and flexible-
Oh, you mean the wood from trees? Well, it would take a SCIENTIST to explain!
8/22/2011 10:42:39 AM
#1324140
Brendan Rizzo
It took that long because the trait has to appear first. If no plants have wood, then there is no disadvantage for not having it. After wood evolved, it turned out that wooded plants could only live where woodless plants could not, and vice versa. There is no competition among them. There is no grass in forests, and no trees in lakes.
8/22/2011 11:16:26 AM
#1324150
Old Viking
The original plants were plastic. It took many decades of effort for them to become real planty-like. Then there was a long stretch of arguing among plants whether to grow tall or stay short. There was much rancor and bitterness. Some went the tall route, some the short. It's pretty complicated.
8/22/2011 11:57:07 AM
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