Quote# 83360

Evolution of WOOD
Can an evolutionist please explain to me how and why WOOD evolved????

FACT: Plants are made of leaves and stems and do not contain any wood.

Evolutionists claim that trees did not evolve for 15 million years after the first plants appeared.

So why did it take so long for wood to evolve why plants would have benefited from having a height advantage over their competitors from the moment they first appeared???

Garvan Elison, http://garvanellison.blogspot.com/ 108 Comments [8/22/2011 3:16:49 AM]
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Do the people who come out with these questions honestly think that they are stumpers and have not been pondered or answered by the scientific community? What do they take the scientific community for?

8/23/2011 6:26:45 AM



Wow. God gave Adam and Eve the best punishment ever, then.

8/23/2011 6:34:24 AM



And I may I just say that casting physical pleasure as a bad thing gives the impression that you belong to a religion of self-hatred?

8/23/2011 6:36:29 AM


This is a dangerous level of comedy gold.I almost put myself in the hospital due to an extreme case of acute spit-take / facepalm / head-desk.

Please give me 2 weeks to recover before you science again.

8/23/2011 7:00:07 AM

Brendan Rizzo

@ Jezebel's Evil Sister:

You know, I was thinking the exact same thing. I think we've got an imposter on our hands.

8/23/2011 7:06:05 AM



"@The Jamo

The origin of the erection is in Original Sin"

Or mayhaps the ultimate in Penis Envy, methinks. Goddy here couldn't take the thought of erections greater than his own:


Thus his having a tammy-huff over the Tower of Babel malarkey. Seems that not only do the hundreds of millions of Iron Chariots we have today mean he's too shit-scared to show his face round here (Judges 1:19, and all that jazz; as Kryptonite is to Superman, Iron is to God, eh?! It's stealth material to him too, as the Bible itself proves), the likes of Canary Wharf & St. Mary Axe (the 'Gherkin') in London, Tokyo Tower in Japan, Willis Tower in Chicago, Petronas Towers in Kuala Lumpur, Taipei 101 in Taiwan, and Burj Khalifa in Dubai - and the fact they're still allowed to stand (so much for his 'omnipotence') - are giving him terminal winkie shrinkage, thus lessening his 'omnipotent' God-powers*! >:D


"Fundamentalist Christianity in a nutshell: "somewhere, someone is having fun and I don't like it". Preventing pleasure is a disturbingly strong obsession for fundies, it's like your only goal in life is to make life miserable for everyone."

(emphasis added):

'Organized religion is a sham and a crutch for weak-minded people who need strength in numbers. It tells people to go out and stick their noses in other people's business.'

-Jesse Ventura (ex-politician, ex-actor, ex-wrestler, and ex-Navy SEAL.)

Do you have the cojones to say to his face he's wrong, Troll4Life? To do so, video recording proceedings & posting such on YouTube as proof?

...thought not.

@The Jamo

It really is all about matters below the waist with these fundies! They're obsessed! See how Troll4Life creates drama by taking your off the cuff joke out of context?

...I trust you'll remember that, next time you accuse we Atheists of 'taking Scripture passages out of context', eh Troll4Life? Remember, dearie: if the Bible isn't the literal 'Word of God throughout, cover to cover, then it's impossible for us to 'take out of context' anything the Bible states. Which kinda fucks up the whole concept of the Bible being the 'Word of God', if it isn't literal throughout, word-for-word, letter-for-letter. Either it is 100% literal, or it's 100% fictional. It can't be both.

Enjoy your paradox (and thus the Bible's 100% fictional bullshittery throughout, cover to cover), dearie.

...oh, and speaking of 'context':


"But the deed is always sinful which is why we need Jesus."

A Holy menage a trois?


-Hedy... er, I mean Hedley Lamarr (Harvey Korman), "Blazing Saddles"

Not only do some Americans have no concept of Irony, they've never heard of the Gratuitous Double-Entendre.


...otherwise Warner Bros. would have named that orca film anything other than "Free Willy", lest it generate the titters & chortles it did here in the UK (and that was before the Michael Jackson connection!). X3

*- Where's Goku when you need him?! >:D

8/23/2011 7:29:58 AM



Ha Haaa! Thank you! Thank you! I'm here all week! Enjoy the buffet!...

8/23/2011 12:39:12 PM



Oh, you poor girl.....

8/23/2011 12:42:31 PM


This whole thing is like "The Yankee Workshop", "The Victory Garden", "Dr. Ruth" & Margaret White rolled into one!

8/23/2011 12:46:38 PM


@ #1324120

Leonard Maltin looks at wood. "I give this wood, uh, 3-Stars!"

8/23/2011 12:49:50 PM


Well, first of all..... Oh it's him. Never mind.

8/23/2011 2:09:33 PM


Plants kept growing taller and taller to reach through the canopy and get to the sunlight and after millions of years, strong, woody trunks were needed to do the job. Why is this so hard for you to understand?

8/23/2011 5:07:21 PM


Uh Oh, I think they are onto us. Quick, hide all the wood and perhaps they wont notice?

8/23/2011 6:26:43 PM


That previous remark about erections did not come from me. I don't know who is impersonating me here. Their position is not Biblical. Sex is blessed by God, but it has a proper context according to the Biblical worldview - the marital relationship. Christianity does not teach that it is sinful for a man to have an erection.

8/23/2011 8:08:15 PM



Whilst the original Tsutenkaku (1912) in Osaka was built along the lines of the Eiffel Tower (which was what inspired the architects of the Tokyo Tower), it's said that the construction of such was after the Japanese architects visited Britain and were inspired by seeing the Blackpool Tower (they were originally thinking of using wood & bamboo for such an erection, but saw the advantages of metal).



PROTIP: 'Tsutenkaku' means 'Tower to Heaven'.

"I don't know who is impersonating me here."

Yeah. As if we've never heard that one before (and after the fact). [/hyper-sarcasm] 'Boy Who Cried Wolf', much dearie? Careful, your Poe is showing.

(*presses Tannoy microphone button*)

Paging Distind. Distind, please go to Admin Room 1, as an IP trace is required.

"Their position is not Biblical"



See what I mean about Gratuitous Double-Entendres, eh SpukiKitty?! They're obsessed! So I guess the only Biblical position is the 'Menage a trois Sandwich' with Jesus on bottom eh, dearie?! >:D

How about 'Conceptual Sex in the Mercenary Position'? Job was certainly willing to whore out his own daughters! Then the little matter of that Holy Ghost (one part of God himself, don't forget!) banging that bit of underage briffit Mary, and leaving his Holy Load in her - when her husband Joseph hadn't even touched her himself. So much for the 7th Commandment eh, dearie? Your so-called 'God' certainly obeys his own rules, doesn't he?! [/mega-sarcasm]

Frankly, we Atheists have more than infinitely superior sexual mores & morals than your 'God', Troll4Life. Proof? Via the example of Job, 'God' sees nothing wrong in underage sex. And as for poor Mary, 'God' himself is nothing less than a child-raping paedophile slimebag nonce. No 'context' required.

*- 'In 1998 a "Walk of Faith" glass floor panel was opened at the top of the tower'


I've stood on that, when I visited Blackpool several years ago. Science destroys 'Faith'. Every time.

8/24/2011 7:00:15 AM



"@The Jamo

The origin of the erection is in Original Sin. Before the Fall, if Adam and Eve got around to procreating, they would have done so without an erection and without pleasure. But now procreation has been corrupted, and people even perform the action with no intent of making babies. But the deed is always sinful which is why we need Jesus."


"That previous remark about erections did not come from me. I don't know who is impersonating me here."




"I can't believe the blasphemy of the title of htis post. Unbelieveable and disgusting. Enjoy having a demon's finger up your butt for eternity, bitch"


"That wasn't from me. Someone is hijacking my name. But it isn't too far from the truth, and you are a bitch."


"As a note,
Come from the same computer."

Fool us once, you break the 9th Commandment and Go to Hell.

Fool us twice, you break the 9th Commandment and go to Hell.

I'm afraid this is where you've gone beyond mere trolling, and have proven yourself to be as dedicated as Garvan is, now Poe4Life.

Therefore in perpetuity, anything you say from now on has less than zero credibility. But then way before now...:


did Giveitaday prove that anything you said had less credibility, you pathological liar.

(And see what I mean, SpukiKitty, re. Double Entendres on the following page? I mean - 'Higgs Bosom'? That's can't even be classed as a deliberate Freudian Slip!)

Even commenter #1066713 on that page saw right through your facade, Poe4Life. Thus, it can be finally said of you - without fear of contradiction - dearie...:

Your failure is now complete.

Oh, no doubt that, before long, you'll return in the not too distant future with extremely selective amnesia, trying to make us believe that we've forgotten about your prior BS & thread/argument abandonment issues, and continue as before, as if nothing had happened; certainly your previous drama via previous appearances here. But as you can see above, FSTDT's server has a long memory, as do we who comment here.

It never pays to try and get one over on we Atheists, Poe4Life. Blinded by 'faith' you may be (or not; just a Garvan-like dedicated Poe, who in reality is as religious as Richard Dawkins), but you'll never pull the wool over the eyes of Atheists. Whose vision is illuminated by the bright light of Facts.

We win. Every time.

8/25/2011 6:52:28 AM



Thank you, Anon-e-moose, you win a BILLION DOLLARS, so to speak...

...Couldn't have said it better!

His4Life...formerly known as Troll4Life...shall be hereby redubbed POE4LIFE!!!

Here's your "Poe Award" (a statuette of a raven, wearing a 'Dunce' cap, pecking a little computer), Poe4Life....for your many contributions to comedy & overall insanity!!! Keep it up! Laughter is the best medicine!

8/25/2011 9:02:23 AM



(*Blushy-blushy*) You've made a happy man feel very old (shome mishtake, shurely?! X3). Your kind words humble me greatly. And to reiterate what you say...:

The jig is up, Poe4Life. It's over.


8/25/2011 9:12:29 AM

The Jamo



Classic, brother. Absolutely classic. Thanks for a great laugh : )

Oh wait, you were serious?

[slowly backs away]

EDIT: Now I don't know what's real any more : ) Poe, troll, fundie? Hahahaha... whatever it is, it's hilarious.

8/25/2011 6:37:40 PM

Boy Koko

I dont't think you and me are thinking about the same kind of wood.

8/25/2011 9:22:33 PM


@ Deep Search you just quoted one of my science textbooks from year 8! (I only know this because I had to copy it for detention) Also did I read his blog right and he claims to possess a PhD?! More proof that a PhD can be bought, where are these guys going to? I want a PhD too!

8/26/2011 3:38:15 AM


@The Jamo
POE4Life! POE4LIFE! We owned Her/Him/It! Poe4Life is the new name!

8/26/2011 2:17:10 PM


Flunked Biology 101, did we?

8/26/2011 2:45:55 PM


That is the stupidest question I've ever heard.
Wood evolved after plants. What's your point?

8/27/2011 10:46:25 PM


Y'know, let's call His4Life "Nuts4Life" and leave it at that.

8/31/2011 6:53:16 AM

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