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Quote# 83911

I don't know about elves...but gnomes...kinda...

the thing i really beleive in are goblins, i live near the edge of the city so behind my house is a river and a forest. I've seen things in the woods that i cant really explain.

Well they're abbout 4 feet tall...well the best way to describe them is golem off of the lord of the rings, but they're eyes aren't as big and they have brown skin that is shiny but it looks more scaly then wet.

I see them all around my side of town late at night. They are fast runners and can jump considerable distances.

_BLiND_, Above Top Secret 23 Comments [9/27/2011 2:51:23 AM]
Fundie Index: 21
WTF?! || meh
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#1335670
Yownanymous

Wait... This seems familiar.

Edit: Now I remember where I saw this before. Not on CSTDT, but when I was actually on ATS for shits and giggles after reading a different quote posted here. Must have got mixed up...

9/27/2011 2:58:48 AM

#1335679


Funny that not even you are sure what your sources are.

9/27/2011 3:12:02 AM

#1335690
Kulgur

1. There are no golems in LotR. Not a lot of Jews to make them, after all.

2. The creature you're talking about is called GOLLUM. I don't care if you're a conspiracy lunatic, I want some respect for the book. It's good.

3. The small, scaly creatures that jump high are called FROGS. Not four feet, and not dangerous. Next time, try looking for them while you're actually sober. They're fascinating creatures, really.

9/27/2011 3:28:29 AM

#1335709
Bollox

^ Yeah, that's what I thought about LoTR, needs more Jews.

Also, to the OP, stop licking the cane toads.

9/27/2011 4:14:54 AM

#1335757
Whitespirit

"I've seen things in the woods that i cant really explain"

I can explain them, it's the mushrooms you've been finding int he woods and eating.

9/27/2011 6:15:57 AM

#1335774
Doubting Thomas

Um, yeah, you might want to lay off the meth.

9/27/2011 6:50:36 AM

#1335794
cdcdrr

Ribbit-what!?

9/27/2011 7:43:19 AM

#1335854
Brendan Rizzo

*Headdesk*

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHH!

Do you really think that, if these creatures live in the woods, that NO ONE ELSE would have ever seen them before? My God you are stupid!

9/27/2011 10:09:58 AM

#1335856
Comrade Potatovich

There's only one goblin I know, and he's...Well, not that good at what he does.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XSbZidsgMfw

9/27/2011 10:24:59 AM

#1335873
werewolf

Gollum not golem, you fool. And he was a hobbit, not a goblin or a gnome.I think what you're describing are called lizards.

9/27/2011 11:53:27 AM

#1335877
Papabear

Take your meds and have a nice lie down.

9/27/2011 11:59:13 AM

#1335880
rikalous

@Kulgur and Bollux: There are lots of Jews in Middle-Earth. The dwarves are just beardy, badass Jews.

"I do think of the 'Dwarves' like Jews: at once native and alien in their habitations, speaking the languages of the country, but with an accent due to their own private tongue."
- J. R. R. Tolkien

Heck, he even based their language and calendar off of the Jewish versions.

9/27/2011 12:07:15 PM

#1335935
aaa

You seriously need to get your brain checked.

9/27/2011 3:58:50 PM

#1335945
nickiknack


9/27/2011 5:24:27 PM

#1335979
Percy Q. Shunn

I know those woods you speak of. I saw this very tree there...


9/27/2011 7:57:38 PM

#1335980
Dorothy Mantooth


9/27/2011 7:59:20 PM

#1335987


Amazing that in this age of technology, you haven't thought to record images of these creatures for posterity. Or were you too drunk to hold the camera steady?

I found your gnome for you dude.

9/27/2011 10:34:28 PM

#1335990
J. James

Sometimes, I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. Sometimes, I just like to pretend like there's a perfectly reasonable explanation for this, such as this person living in Australia near a pack of wallabies with unfortunate skin conditions. Or perhaps suffering from being retarded.

This is not one of those times.

9/27/2011 11:01:43 PM

#1336086


Sounds like maybe you have some large raccoons or something. I'm guessing the scales are all in your silly imagination.

9/28/2011 6:33:40 AM

#1336141
Zits

They be hangin' with da sasquach!

9/28/2011 9:22:08 AM

#1336578
meh

*herds kangaroo mutants away from forest*
Damn, you found my experiments. My mistake, don't worry, you'll be safe now.

9/30/2011 5:50:50 AM

#1350352
GestaltZe

:o He sees Gravelings! http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/5/57/Graveling.jpg/220px-Graveling.jpg

11/19/2011 5:34:44 PM

#1374610
Karana

Pics or it didn't happen.

2/13/2012 8:33:59 PM
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