Quote# 85457

What I believe is this: if you masturbate, you will turn into a homosexual, if you aren't one already. If you become a homosexual, it's only a matter of time before you gratify yourself with an animal, and you will catch AIDS and die.

Michael Crook, Michael Crook's Blog 83 Comments [1/3/2012 4:16:01 AM]
Fundie Index: 185

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Troll. And not a good one, either.

1/6/2012 6:17:01 AM

Burning Stake

I would fall off my chair laughing, except for the fact that this has to be a troll. It has to be. No one today could be this stupid...right?!

1/6/2012 8:08:21 PM

Agnostic Jew

Odd...don't straight men masturbate to images of naked women? And homosexuality means an attraction to members of the same sex of your own species. Oh, and you can't catch AIDS from an animal (except certain primates).

1/6/2012 9:56:05 PM

There is no problem with masturbation that Nair and an optometrist cant fix.

God killing a kitten every time is a Christian problem.

1/7/2012 10:28:42 AM


46, still single, still preferring what you so abhor to either committing rape or paying a prostitute (neither of which I think you'd condone)... and still not aroused one whit by a nekkid man, let alone a goat or a sheep.

You might want to rethink your belief, or at least get rid of that mighty slippery cliff you've going there.

1/11/2012 5:46:57 PM


Tested your theory. Still straight.

1/11/2012 7:55:27 PM


What I believe is this: If you pray and go to church every Sunday, you will turn into a penguin. If you have become a penguin, it's only a matter of time before you start dancing and singing, and you will star in the next installment of Happy Feet.

Makes perfect sense.

1/12/2012 12:52:31 AM

Pharaoh Bastethotep

Er, no, that's just you.

3/20/2017 2:14:29 PM

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