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Quote# 85468

HILDALE, Washington County — As the year comes to an end and the followers of Warren Jeffs await the apocalypse he has predicted, they're living under a challenging edict: they're forbidden to have sex until Jeffs is sprung from a Texas prison.

"He has predicted that the walls in the prison where he's at will fall and crumble," said Joni Holm, who has many relatives in the polygamous FLDS faith.

According to Holm, Fundamentalist LDS Church members also face their faith's most severe punishment, excommunication, if they conceive a child.

It's one of the strangest edicts in a season full of them. Jeffs has issued a stream of revelations, prophecies and orders to his congregation in the border community of Hildale, Utah, and Colorado City, Ariz.

The recent edicts from Jeffs' prison cell seem to be having two contradictory effects. Many are leaving the FLDS faith in disgust. Those who stay are reported to be increasingly devoted to a man who is serving a lifetime sentence for raping underage girls.

According to numerous critics and outside observers, the imprisoned FLDS leader has sometimes acted through his brother Lyle and other times has spoken directly to his congregation over the phone from prison. He recently banned many of the things his followers enjoy: bicycles, ATVs, trampolines, even children's toys. But the sex edict reaches into the bedrooms of all his devoted followers.

According to Holm, Jeffs declared all existing marriages to be void.

"Right now they have all been told that they are not to live as husband and wife," Holm said. "They can live in the same house, but they are not to have sexual relationships until Warren comes out and 'reseals' them."

Warren Jeffs, Deseret News 67 Comments [1/9/2012 4:01:24 AM]
Fundie Index: 84
Submitted By: Stormwarden
WTF?! || meh
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bluejaysfan

The prison he's at needs to muzzle this sicko.

1/9/2012 4:27:26 AM



No no he needs to keep it up, the crazier he gets the more people are going to leave the religion.

1/9/2012 4:38:38 AM

C_V


the more you tighten your fist, Jeffs, the quicker they slip awsy. keep at it!

1/9/2012 4:41:27 AM

shykid

...yeeep. I pretty much predicted that once he was arrested, he would kick the crazy into full throttle in a desperate struggle to retain complete control over his members, and his little cult would crumble into pieces as a result.

1/9/2012 4:48:21 AM

Mister Spak

"The recent edicts from Jeffs' prison cell seem to be having two contradictory effects. Many are leaving the FLDS faith in disgust. Those who stay are reported to be increasingly devoted to a man who is serving a lifetime sentence for raping underage girls. "

Leading to an increase in the average fundieness.

1/9/2012 5:04:27 AM

The Jamo

.... Right. And they're listening to this whackjob, why????

1/9/2012 5:16:32 AM

Robespierre

"Many are leaving the FLDS faith in disgust. Those who stay are reported to be increasingly devoted to a man who is serving a lifetime sentence for raping underage girls."

Unfortunately, this is a case of belief evaporation (a known cult phenomenon): the comparatively sane leave, the truly crazy remain, so the cult gets smaller and crazier.

It's a common feature of end-times cults after the public humiliation of failed predictions; though luckily these nuts probably won't go the Supreme Truth way.

1/9/2012 5:17:23 AM

Reynardine

What we have here is a malignant narcissist whose grandiosity has taken him smack over Niagara Falls and whose tyranny, I hope, may be moderated somewhat when he finds himself with plural husbands, whether he wants them or not.

1/9/2012 5:38:45 AM

Swede

They leave in disgust when they are not allowed to have sex, but the fact that their leader has raped several children does not disgust them?


1/9/2012 5:40:43 AM

Dr.Shrinker

"Those who stay are reported to be increasingly devoted to a man who is serving a lifetime sentence for raping underage girls."

Cognitive dissonance, the cult leader's best friend

1/9/2012 5:53:59 AM

Serph-no-Okami

If you can't have any fun in prison, then by golly, you'll suck all the fun out of the lives of the people who pay attention to what you say!

We need more of these nutters (sans the raping, obviously), they do more to warn the people of the dangers of fundamentalism then we ever could.

1/9/2012 5:56:16 AM

Cy

Great news, when you think about it. The people for whom there is still hope are leaving the cult in droves, and the ones who remain aren't going to be birthing any more brainwashed children for the cult.

1/9/2012 6:06:27 AM



Where's a common prison thug to shiv this guy in the yard when ya need one?

1/9/2012 6:07:46 AM

Quantum Mechanic

Mormon.
Another synonym for stupid.

1/9/2012 6:11:09 AM

Vermicious Knid

As the year comes to an end and the followers of Warren Jeffs await the apocalypse he has predicted, they're living under a challenging edict: they're forbidden to have sex until Jeffs is sprung from a Texas prison.

By golly, if he's not allowed to rape underage girls anymore, neither are his followers! I'll bet the "wives" in these scenarios aren't too broken up about not having to service creepy old men anymore.

1/9/2012 6:11:26 AM

emau99

Yeah, OK Warren.

Don't drop the soap.

1/9/2012 7:05:15 AM

Canadiest

@Swede

"They leave in disgust when they are not allowed to have sex, but the fact that their leader has raped several children does not disgust them?"

I think he was married to the underage girls, something the Bible supports so the prick had scriptual backing.

Not allowing sex however would violate the "be fruitful and multiply" concepts, amoungst others, so his members could leave the cult with an easy mind. Also, he's not there and he's not coming back, they may just have gotten their backbones back without his presence or the law put some deprogramming tactics into the mix.

Sadly though, I'm betting most sought out some competing messiah within the batshit sects ever increasing franchises.

1/9/2012 7:21:41 AM

Doubting Thomas

Well at least the idiots still following him won't have any more children to pass their lunacy on to.

1/9/2012 7:28:46 AM

Horsefeathers

I'm baffled as to why anyone would ever listen to somebody like this. I just don't get it.

Talk about being a sheep.

1/9/2012 7:29:25 AM



I love how the rape and abuse of children didn't make any of them "leave in disgust", but when the horny old men who live in houses full of girls and women can't get laid anymore, THEN they walk out. But no, polygamy was never about sex, right?

1/9/2012 8:00:44 AM



Best news I've ever heard about the FLDS. No more children born into a dangerous, abusive cult can only be a good thing.

1/9/2012 8:04:27 AM

Brendan Rizzo

While Jeffs is a complete monster of the highest order, I must say that I am glad that most of his followers are leaving his cult. Maybe they'll learn to see reason.

1/9/2012 8:21:33 AM

Prager

Why do religionists seem to try and make everyone as miserable as them?

1/9/2012 8:25:09 AM

Anon-e-moose

"The recent edicts from Jeffs' prison cell seem to be having two contradictory effects. Many are leaving the FLDS faith in disgust. Those who stay are reported to be increasingly devoted to a man who is serving a lifetime sentence for raping underage girls."



Ever hear of Harold Camping? I hear the same is happening to his cult, post-Great Disappointment III late last year. And like Kent 'Oh, Mark 12:17 doesn't apply to me!' Hovind, enjoy your new position in jail, buster: mostly the 'picking up the dropped soap' one; either in the showers or over your bunk, as you become the very recipient of the exact same torture you gave those poor victims of yours, you subhuman nonce.

My Schadenfreude levels are OVER 9000!


"Warren comes out and 'reseals' them."

Now why am I imagining Warren Jeffs as someone on 4chan's /a/ as an ex-closet little girl who cosplays as Sakura Kinomoto, frilly outfit, staff, cards & all, who strikes poses, exclaiming 'Return to your original form: CLOW CARD!' X3

1/9/2012 8:46:59 AM

= POPE =

Paging Mr. Barnum... Mr. P.T. Barnum ...

And please remember folks, you need to have your original soft-in-the-head ware key handy, and re-register with Mormonsoft after you are resealed. /Geek

1/9/2012 8:59:22 AM
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