Home Archives Random Quotes Latest Comments Top 100 Submit Quote Search Log In

Quote# 86359

Looking at British soccer performance over time isolates the effect of atheism. As atheism has grown in Britain, it's ability to compete in the World Cup has fallen to pathetically weak levels. Atheism causes underachievement.

Andy Schlafly, Conservapedia 105 Comments [3/8/2012 3:02:01 PM]
Fundie Index: 143
Submitted By: Night Jaguar
WTF?! || meh
Username:
Comment:



1 2 3 4 5
Dawn

WTF? I thought it was sex before the big game that was the problem. Now it's atheism?

3/8/2012 3:04:47 PM

superlambbannana

Come on Assfly, this is stupid even by your standards.

3/8/2012 3:12:05 PM

mrbrownpants

"Atheism causes underachievement."

Maybe so in athletics, but it's a completely different story in fields that actually matter like science and engineering.

3/8/2012 3:17:49 PM

Adey

So we have only won the world cup once, in 1966.
Britain was just as atheist then as now.
The smell of desperation from Assfly gets stronger all the time.

3/8/2012 3:18:55 PM



Is there no topic Andy will fail to expound upon? There's a major flaw in his argument. England are not underachieving. They do about as well as an (at best) slightly above average side should be expected to. Thinking otherwise is a faith position, ignoring the evidence of the many teams much better than England. It's just the kind of thing I'd expect from a religious nut.

3/8/2012 3:19:34 PM

IanC

Whaaaaaaattttttt? This would be funny is he wasn't being serious.

3/8/2012 3:23:41 PM

Lucilius

You know, he's right. I've been an atheist for 20 years, and in all that time I've never been any good at kicking soccer balls.

I will immediately start buddying up to Jebus, and I expect great athletic talent to follow. That's how it works, right?

3/8/2012 3:24:28 PM

Prager

Care to back this up with some honest to goodness research? (Not that Andy is capable of doing anything that involves honesty.)

3/8/2012 3:28:47 PM

Doubting Thomas

So what's Andy's excuse? Besides being mentally ill, that is.

3/8/2012 3:35:19 PM

C_M_S

So...how does he explain the performance of a country like say...the Netherlands? High - and growing - percentage of atheists, regularly reaches semis and finals of major tournaments. Which is way overachieving for a country of only 17 million people.

3/8/2012 3:38:02 PM

checkmate

He who has eyes to see ...

Let's analyze this:

1. Schafly wants to talk about something outside of the US, as if he even acknowledges the existence of anything outside of the US.

2. Being an American right wing extremist, soccer is the only activity Schafly knows of, which he believes some people might (wrongly in his opinion) consider a sport.

3. Being an American right wing extremist, when speaking of anything outside of the US, the only country he will ever mention is England, simply because they speak English. He can't understand anybody else, so he ignores their existence.

American right wing extremists have three international catagories, i.e. "the World":

a. The US (the only place that matters)

b. England (doesn't matter, but can be used as an example)

c. the rest (totally inconsequential).

4. Being an American right wing extremist, everything outside the US is viewed as being atheist.

This fits very well into the normal pattern used by American right wing extremists to speak about "the world": use England as an example and damn them in the process.

Now, if Schafly had said that atheism prevents England from succesfully shooting penalties against Germany, he may have had a point, but that's a soccer insight he will never have. ;-)

Btw. how in the world did North Korea ever qualify for the final 32 in 2010 if atheism makes teams "fall to pathetically weak levels"?

Let's take Schafly's "logic" one step further: openly praying on the field prevents NFL teams from getting to the Super Bowl. Screwing top models prevents NFL teams from winning the Super Bowl. - Prove me wrong! ;-)

3/8/2012 3:52:46 PM

WWWWolf

> #1380937
> C_M_S
> So...how does he explain the performance of a country like say...the Netherlands?

Oh, they'll just bring up the fact that Atheist Netherlands lost to the Catholic Spain in 2010.

Seriously, that's the exact argument Andy presented back then. All proof they needed to make this unprecedently insightful analysis on football.

3/8/2012 3:53:01 PM

cdcdrr

Oh, they'll just bring up the fact that Atheist Netherlands lost to the Catholic Spain in 2010.

Oh they're not that catholic. There's still a fair amount of people who remember the church's approval of fascist Spain versus the democratic republic. By Andy's logic, Italy would probably have won 2010, and they have the needed skills of acting and exaggeration for it.

3/8/2012 4:11:15 PM

Martha Jones

My cousin plays in the premier league, and I can tell you that he's far from an atheist. And besides, I thought Americans didn't like that kind of football anyway.

3/8/2012 4:11:53 PM

tranz2deep

C'mon, Andy, you can confide in us; are you just throwing darts at a newspaper and randomly associating snippets of narrative?

3/8/2012 4:46:18 PM

JSS

1) We notice a consistent pattern in Trend A over the years.
2) We also notice a consistent pattern in Trend B over the years.
3) Therefore, Trend A and Trend B automatically carry a cause and effect relationship.

3/8/2012 4:47:55 PM



Looking at the average global temperature over time isolates the effect of piracy. As the global number of pirates fell, the global temperature has increased to dangerously high levels. Piracy prevents global warming.

3/8/2012 5:08:42 PM

Rabbit of Caerbannog

...Andy, you're far beyond a parody at this point.

3/8/2012 5:10:18 PM

LAchlan

I'm from Scotland and our team has always been shite. "Religion" seems to do nothing where I'm from except make people hate each other.

3/8/2012 5:18:54 PM

Godlesspanther

And fundieism is a direct cause of excellence by the highest standards as we can see by the incredibly high quality articles that are on Conservapedia. We also might take notice that Jack Chick is one of the all-time greatest masters in both art and literature. And Ray Comfort knows more about science than Stephen Hawking. And the greatest movie ever made? Was it Left Behind or A thief in the Night? Hard to say, they're both so amazing.

3/8/2012 5:30:02 PM

Amadan

Lachlan, shall we ruin Andy's day by pointing out that it was the traditionally Calvinist Rangers that went bankrupt rather than the idolatrous Taigs in Celtic?

3/8/2012 5:31:52 PM



"Oh, they'll just bring up the fact that Atheist Netherlands lost to the Catholic Spain in 2010."

Yeah... Catholic Spain, where gays can marry. I doubt Schlafly will bring this one up.

3/8/2012 6:08:59 PM

J. James

Atheism doesn't cause underacheivement, you jackass. Religion, however, causes mental underachievement.

3/8/2012 6:09:38 PM

Alencon

WTF? Oh wait, it's Andy. That explains it.

3/8/2012 6:17:05 PM

emau99

Before Conservapedia, British performed well in World Cup soccer. After Conservapedia, it didn't.

You be the judge.

3/8/2012 6:21:52 PM
1 2 3 4 5