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Quote# 86583

The British Monarchy is now desperate to destroy the United States, Russia, China, and India in an orchestrated thermonuclear confrontation, which they believe will be centered in Eurasia and North America, and will wipe out six out of seven billion inhabitants of this planet. That mass genocide has been the policy of Prince Philip and his ilk for a very long time, but now it comes down to a matter of absolute desperation, given the accelerating disintegration of that monetarist system, particularly the so-called Eurozone.

[...]

Iran and Syria are the mere triggering events. The British Empire’s objective is a global thermonuclear holocaust. In their sick delusions, they believe that they will survive this thermonuclear World War III and that their imperial system will be preserved.

Volubrjotr, Political Vel Craft 38 Comments [3/23/2012 4:01:09 AM]
Fundie Index: 27
WTF?! || meh
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Bollox

Oh, come on. Obvious Poe is obvious.

3/23/2012 4:49:33 AM

Brendan Rizzo

If this were the nineteenth century (assuming nukes existed then) I could theoretically believe this. After all, back then the British Empire was as imperialistic and hated worldwide as the United States of America is today, and the British elites despised the US for breaking away from their empire, Russia for competing with their imperial ambitions, China for refusing to be conquered by a European imperialist, and India for well, not being European. It was official British policy back in the 1800s to take over the world by any means necessary, and to treat the subjugated inhabitants like crap.

HOWEVER,

the British Empire is long dead, and so to claim that the British monarchy has any power whatsoever is idiotic. The British people don't like Americans very much, precisely because we are following in the footsteps of the nineteenth-century imperialists.

3/23/2012 5:13:17 AM

Bollox

Fuck off, Rizzo. Myself I quite like Americans, for the most part, but I'm willing to make an exception in your case.

3/23/2012 5:21:30 AM

Reynardine

And now, as the Grand Duchy of Fenwick prepares to take over the solar system...

3/23/2012 5:43:26 AM

thelivingguano

Berwick-Upon-Tweed is at War with the Universe

3/23/2012 5:45:18 AM

nutbunny

"an orchestrated thermonuclear confrontation,"

I have this image of the Queen standing in front of a blazing horizon of plasma miming movements with a conductors baton in her hand, a senile smile on her face.

3/23/2012 5:47:27 AM

Doubting Thomas

Wow, when you think about kooky conspiracy theories, they usually don't hinge on the Queen of England ruling the world.

3/23/2012 6:34:27 AM

aaa

I don't think the british empire has much influence over anything anymore.

3/23/2012 8:34:31 AM

dfmfundies

At most, the UK is estimated to have 225 nuclear warheads - not enough to destroy the U.S., Russia and China. And if UK leaders were insane enough to launch a first strike, one of those three nations would retaliate with such force that the island would glow for centuries.

3/23/2012 10:35:37 AM

LV426

That's funny. I saw a PBS documentary about Prince Philip just the other day, and I can't say I remember the bit about his plans for thermonuclear holocaust.

And as an aside - Can I just say, as an American myself, that I haven't been in the least bit offended by Brendan Rizzo's recent "anti-American rhetoric". I mean, sure, he's making some broad generalizations, but the gist of what he's been saying isn't really all that far off the mark.

I've noticed that many people keep saying that other countries are just as bad and that most Americans are sane rational people, and yet there are plenty of statistics that show America is the least secular First World nation and that roughly 50% of Americans consider atheism immoral and undesirable. I've also noticed that a fair number of his detractors aren't actually American and don't really have to put up with the sort of pervasive religious atmosphere this country has.

He might be being a bit more aggressive than some of you might consider strictly necessary, but I think Rizzo has gotten a disproportionate amount of hate lately. Just my two cents on it.

3/23/2012 12:38:10 PM

Giardano Bruno

British and this is the silliest thing I have ever seen here.

3/23/2012 1:15:52 PM

Saint Germain

It isn't that Brendan Rizzo is totally wrong, its just that he is so cunty about it.

Also, the rest of the world doesn't hate America, and the rest of the world doesn't love America. The rest of the world is a big place with many people who think a lot of different things about many subjects.

Finally, the whole American Imperialism meme is such douchey post-hippy nonsense. Its the liberal inverse of the Conservative "WAAAARGHABL" normally featured on the website.

3/23/2012 4:22:14 PM

Reynardine

They already deployed a weapon of mass destruction. It was called English cooking. Fortunately, agents from S.P.I.C.E. learned how to disarm it (Peace, Churchill's Pub... Yours was rather good)

3/24/2012 5:45:33 AM

Brendan Rizzo

Let me explain that I was referencing how bad the British Empire was in the nineteenth century. At no point was I talking about the modern world. People need better reading comprehension, it seems.

3/24/2012 7:34:43 AM

LV426

@Saint Germain

I acknowledged that Rizzo was being a bit aggressive and making generalizations, or as you put it being "cunty". Yes, I can see why people think he's being rude. All I said was that I myself hadn't been offended by it and that I thought people were overreacting to it. That's all. I don't see how someone telling him to "fuck off" or calling him "cunty" helps anything.

I also think that dismissing the concept of American Imperialism as "douchey post-hippy nonsense" is heavy-handed. Given the fact that we have military bases in 36 countries and Neoconservatives both embrace and promote the idea of an American Empire, it should be easy to see how someone could come to that conclusion. Even if we're not an Imperial power, there are an awful lot of loud Americans who think we either are or should be.

All that aside, whatever happened to "don't feed the trolls"? If you think Rizzo is being an ass, ignore him. If you don't, don't. But this recent trend of Rizzo making one post and six more cropping up to tell him to shut up is, frankly, petty and idiotic, especially when he's not even demonstrably wrong. At any rate, it clearly isn't solving the so-called problem, is it? So what's the point?

I think everyone involved would be better served by just chilling out a bit. It certainly couldn't do us any more harm than this reactionary infighting.

Maybe I'm playing the Devil's advocate, fine. I don't expect anybody to agree with me, but everybody else has weighed in on this at some point, so I figured I may as well too, even if my opinion is unpopular. Just trying to inject a little calm, as is my nature. And doing it badly...as is also my nature.

3/24/2012 7:57:46 AM

Thrutch

Life is not a steampunk novel

Liz Battenburg and Phil the Greek are not secret rulers of the universe.

3/25/2012 1:25:39 AM

Bollox

Let me explain that I was referencing how bad the British Empire was in the nineteenth century.

And as usual getting it wrong. Not to mention all that 'Britons don't like Americans' bollocks. If was as ignorant as you, Rizzo, I'd STFU.

Ah, fuck it, who cares. I'm here to point and laugh at fundies, not argue with idiots.

3/25/2012 4:21:48 AM

Reynardine

I'd have to object to applying "cunt" and "cunty" to apparently straight biological males as subscribing to the notion that a female sex organ is the most degrading, dirty, inferior, and repulsive attribute anyone can possess. Think about it.

3/25/2012 11:32:17 AM

LV426

I think Bollox has just handily proven my point.

Whatever anyone may think of Rizzo, in what universe is his last post mature, intelligent, or constructive in any way? What was the point?

"Who cares"?
I would suggest the guy who comes back two days after his last post for no other reason than to call someone an idiot while insisting he doesn't care probably cares more than most people here do.

EDIT: I also have to agree with Reynardine's point.

3/25/2012 11:41:35 AM

BlackMageJ

Where are you getting your facts fro... hang, on this sounds familiar. Britain being the only place left relatively unscathed after a nuclear war, and becoming increasingly imperialist...

You've just read V For Vendetta, haven't you? And by the looks of it, you understood its meaning about as well as the Wachowski brothers.

3/25/2012 2:24:31 PM

Bollox

Nobody told me I had to be mature, intelligent or constructive!

Fuck that for a lark. I come here to be as immature as I possibly can!

3/26/2012 4:09:05 AM

LV426

@Bollox

Funny. This is a new one on me. I've never had someone admit to being immature while simultaneously trying to pretend they have the moral high ground. I'm not quite sure how that works.

I know, we're all here to make fun of fundie morons. It's not exactly the most mature pastime, but at least most commenters here seem to strive for rebuttal and/or wit in the process. This site would be in a poor way indeed if every comment on every quote was no more than "fuck off". Besides, I don't think it's much of a stretch to think we ought to be a bit more civil towards each other than we are towards our common target.

Even without that, I can't figure out how you can think that you have a right to be insulting towards an individual here, but that individual doesn't have the right to be insulting towards the country that he himself has to live in. Really, it reminds me of the "love it or leave it" bullshit Right Wingers spouted in the Bush years, but you don't even live here. Either you have the right to be insulting and so does he, in which case you have no grounds to attack him, or he doesn't and neither do you, and you need to be calmer in your response. No double standards. You can't have it both ways.


3/26/2012 6:35:55 AM

Bollox

@ LV426

Humourless cunt.

3/26/2012 8:21:08 AM

practical god

Since we're bringing out the sexual epithets, don't be a dick. Why is this such a hard rule to follow?

3/26/2012 8:34:35 AM

werewolf

Queen Kate can enslave me anytime.

3/26/2012 10:52:56 AM
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