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Quote# 86823

[Part of a response to a Christian who feels like God has abandoned him]

Yes I am blunt and I know sometimes I can hurt people by being so, but you have to understand that this is not about you, it is about God. You owe Him everything and He owes you nothing, not even the next breath. Have you eaten today? If so then thank God for it. Do you have clothes? If so then thank God. Get out your Bible and start reading it. Read Paul's letters to the churches. Most all of them were written from prison cells. Have you been in prison because of Christ? If so then praise God that you were found worthy of suffering for Him.

Have your efforts brought even one soul into the kingdom? If so then praise God, the angels do every time one soul comes to know God. Even if you don't know of anyone who has come to Christ because of your efforts, the point is you have no idea how God has used you, or if someone you don't know about came to Him because of your witness. However, the kind of witness you gave in the message to me will not win souls.

God has not been defeated by Satan but it appears that you have. Ask God to forgive you for thinking that He has betrayed you. If you are not willing to do that, then at least quit calling yourself a Christian so that you don't harm souls.


ralph, behindthebadge 75 Comments [4/8/2012 3:30:01 AM]
Fundie Index: 83
WTF?! || meh
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Kinderklein

"However, the kind of witness you gave in the message to me will not win souls"

What happened to god working in mysterious ways?

"God has not been defeated by Satan but it appears that you have."

Nice judgement.

4/8/2012 3:35:06 AM

Filin De Blanc

What a cock.

"I'm struggling to believe in God."
"How could you, you douchebag!?"

4/8/2012 3:53:46 AM

Matante

Even rats have shown to feel empathy toward their own kind.

Ralph, you are less than a rat.

4/8/2012 4:07:14 AM

Pule Thamex

What you have to remember when you praise a non-existent God is that He in His magnificent ethereality will be inclined to not acknowledge your existence. Hardly a peculiar stance to take, after all if you were non-existent you'd hardly be inclined to acknowledge the existence of anything, let alone yourself.

But occasionally, a fictional God-entity may decide to take a vacation in the non-existent-God-shaped hole in your head. If such an event should happen, then you can immediately take advantage of its temporary residence.

First thing you'll notice is that it'll take advantage of its proximity to your brain and make holy your every thought so that the vacationing God seems to agree with you on everything.

Second thing, you'll find your abilities to spout nonsense, lies and deluded garbage is greatly enhanced. In this way you will prepare other people's God-shaped holes to be ready for when the non-existent God is ready to move on and vacation in someone else's head.

Third thing, your capacity for copious drooling will reach epic proportions and your fiction writing abilities will become word-saladesque.

4/8/2012 4:17:11 AM

D Laurier

This God guy didnt give me my food. I bought it myself, with money I earned by working at a crappy job.
Why should I thank your God character for food he/she did not give to me?


4/8/2012 4:17:48 AM

Not Today

Somebody is considering suicide, and that's the "Christian" advice they're given? Holy crap! The OP is basically saying that he doesn't think life is worth living and the response is "yup, you're right."

4/8/2012 4:19:01 AM

Jockaira

I just came here directly from redmeat.com while chowin' down on a can of Alaskan Pink Salmon, and started right in reading the crap above...for a moment I thought that I had clicked on another of Earl's soliliquies.

I read the text above again and somehow cannot see much difference between Ralph and Earl.

4/8/2012 4:54:33 AM

Reynardine

That's right. You're as worthless as you feel until you've gotten inside someone else's head and effed it up until they feel as worthless as you do.

4/8/2012 5:26:56 AM

OhJohnNo

"Dear God, we paid for all this stuff ourselves, so thanks for nothing." - Bart Simpson

4/8/2012 5:28:43 AM

Reynardine

Oh, yeah, and this guy's name would be ra-a-a-alph, wouldn't it?

4/8/2012 5:30:49 AM



I can imagine some sheltered suburban kid, writing this drivel about "suffering for Christ" on his new iPad.

4/8/2012 5:43:05 AM

Jeff D.

I question any religion that says that suffering is a virtue.

4/8/2012 5:57:23 AM

The Wild One, Forever

Heartless, cold, arrogant, and cruel. Yes, Ralph is a true Christian fundie.

4/8/2012 6:13:45 AM

fmitchell

"You owe Him everything and He owes you nothing, not even the next breath."

God brought you into this world, so he can take you out just as easily. Now cut God a switch to beat you with. Naw, bigger than that. Don't make God get offa this couch.

4/8/2012 6:24:40 AM

The_L

Well, SOMEbody clearly hasn't read the Bible.

Psalm 22

The Passion according to Matthew

That's right, even JESUS said stuff like this.

4/8/2012 6:25:35 AM

Horsefeathers

"Yes I am blunt and I know sometimes I can hurt people by being so, but you have to understand that this is not about you, it is about God."

This god character sure has one hell of an inflated ego. Probably because of people like you.

"You owe Him everything and He owes you nothing, not even the next breath."

Given his fragile ego and incessant need for people to tell him how wonderful he is, I believe he needs me more than I need him.

"Have you eaten today? If so then thank God for it. Do you have clothes? If so then thank God."

Why? God, so far as I can tell, had no hand in any of the actual labor that went into anything that I eat or wear.

"Get out your Bible and start reading it."

I've tried. I can't get past the absurdity that's in Genesis, let alone the rest of it.

"Read Paul's letters to the churches. Most all of them were written from prison cells."

Paul was more than slightly delusional. Paul also never even met your Christ, so why he's so important and why Christians constantly defer to him--even over Jesus--is somewhat of a mystery to me.

"Have your efforts brought even one soul into the kingdom? If so then praise God, the angels do every time one soul comes to know God. Even if you don't know of anyone who has come to Christ because of your efforts, the point is you have no idea how God has used you, or if someone you don't know about came to Him because of your witness. However, the kind of witness you gave in the message to me will not win souls.

God has not been defeated by Satan but it appears that you have. Ask God to forgive you for thinking that He has betrayed you. If you are not willing to do that, then at least quit calling yourself a Christian so that you don't harm souls."


Ah. I see. This explains why Paul appeals to you. You seem as delusional as he was.

4/8/2012 6:35:02 AM

Mudak

I don't get the whole "praise god because you have clothes" concept. Isn't it god's fuck-up in the garden of Eden that we even see the need for clothes in the first place?

4/8/2012 7:17:27 AM

Fundies Make Me Sick

This one didn't get fundie until the very end. Christians get discouraged all the time and feel like God has left them. Even Mother Teresa said she didn't feel His presence all the time.

What people like the respondee need is encouragement, not the "you're worthless and God only cares about converting people" attitude that ralph is displaying. That's likely going to make the respondee quit Christianity altogether.

4/8/2012 7:20:43 AM

Reynardine

Quit Christianity? Good!

4/8/2012 7:31:00 AM

Jezebel's Evil Sister

Meh. Standard christian crap. Not especially fundie. Just ignorant and mean-spirited.

Like I said, standard.

4/8/2012 7:46:47 AM

Papabear

"...it is about God. You owe Him everything and He owes you nothing."

Hmm. That would explain why I have received nothing from God... either that or he doesn't exist.

"However, the kind of witness you gave in the message to me will not win souls."

Nevermind the truth of that message, just remember that Paul said it's OK to lie if you're lying for God.

4/8/2012 8:16:36 AM

aaa

This guy reminds me of the inquisitors of the medieval ages.

4/8/2012 9:15:38 AM

Tatsukun

Why do so many xtians sound a lot like abused wives / kids?

4/8/2012 9:56:23 AM

J. James

Someone is trying very, very hard to shake one loose from the flock. Hypocrisy much?

4/8/2012 9:59:54 AM

Iel

...Dude, you're not helping your cause at all.

Come on now, all you're gonna do is push the guy away, and that's not what Christianity's about.

I'm feeling pretty mellow, since it's Zombie Jesus Day and all, but you're being a great big bag o' dicks. I don't bother thanking God for anything less that supernatural intervention -- the shit I can't control -- and so far, he hasn't ducked me over for it.

Of course, all I ever ask for is a dash of support now and then, and when I do pray, it's just to get shit off my chest and to hang out with my favourite angel, Uriel (since he guards the Gates of Eden he doesn't get out as much as Michael, Gabriel, and Raphael do), so it's not like I'm some ungrateful little bitch about it either.

Plus, Paul was a dick with a few good ideas. He wasn't even an apostle, so I don't know why his theologic writings made it into the Bible and others didn't.

*wanders back to Tumblr*

4/8/2012 10:01:35 AM
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