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Quote# 87974

Ohio's Jim Flechtner is demanding that the Aesculus glabra, better known as the Ohio Buckeye be revoked of state tree status because it bears male, female and bisexual flowers on the same tree.

“The buckeye is our state tree and most of us gladly wear the nickname, "buckeyes." But it is shameful and unacceptable that a bisexual tree should represent us! We are flaunting the Holy Bible!

I urge everyone to contact their state representative and demand legislation removing the buckeye as our state tree and condemning the use of the term "buckeye" as a nickname for residents of Ohio.”

Jim Fletchner, Huffington Post 70 Comments [6/24/2012 3:12:04 AM]
Fundie Index: 75
WTF?! || meh
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#1415947
Le Proon

You are bring threatened by flowers...

GROW UP.

6/24/2012 3:19:30 AM

#1415949
OhJohnNo

This can't be real.

It can't be.

Please...

6/24/2012 3:21:16 AM

#1415955
Woody

Your own sexuality is threatened by a tree? Seriously, are you twelve?

A bisexual is a person who is attracted to both genders and sometimes has sex with one or both. Last time I checked, threes don't usually go to bed with each other. A tree is, well.. a tree. In this case one that bears flowers of each sex (like most trees). It is actually fairly uncommon for trees to bear only flowers of one sex.

You are an idiot.

6/24/2012 3:27:39 AM

#1415965
noko

Them gays have even infected the trees, I tell ya what!

6/24/2012 3:40:30 AM

#1415970
Philbert McAdamia

Burn the rain forests! Them queer trees are a-comin' ta GIT US!

6/24/2012 4:10:20 AM

#1415971
Reynardine

This guy can't stand a queer little horse chestnut, and yet he doubtless has eaten table fruits* and dessert fruits both, which come from bisexual flowers.

*Such as eggplants, tomatoes, peppers, pumpkins, squash, cucumbers, okra...

Oh, and let's not forget. No matter what kind of grain it's made out of, his bread is queer.

6/24/2012 4:14:16 AM

#1415972
shykid

When your homophobic delusions get so bad that even plants are pushing a sinister queer agenda in your paranoid little mind, it's time to seek professional help.

ETA: Good to know this is a Poe. Also sorta sad to know that real homophobic fuckwits are so ridiculous that this seems like something they'd actually say in earnest, but such is the joy of Poe's law.

6/24/2012 4:15:45 AM

#1415975
Darwin

Confirmed as a poe: http://www.npr.org/blogs/thetwo-way/2012/06/18/155297882/ban-the-buckeye-for-being-bisexual-we-now-have-hoax-no-3?ps=cprs

6/24/2012 4:22:39 AM

#1415981
maxedout

Whether it's a Poe or not, I always said John Otway & Wild Willy Barrett were right.

"Beware of the flowers 'cause I'm sure they're gonna get you... Yeah"

6/24/2012 4:38:21 AM

#1415983
Gawd

I think someone is poking a little fun at the Christians . . .

6/24/2012 4:45:51 AM

#1415985
OhJohnNo

Thank you very much, Darwin. My sanity is safe.

6/24/2012 4:48:15 AM

#1415987
whatever

Aw it's a poe. That's not fair! Sniff...

6/24/2012 5:02:57 AM

#1415994
Arnold Facepalmer

His God made the tree that way, right? Oh, wait, it "chose" to be that way and it's a fad.

What a tool

6/24/2012 5:22:03 AM

#1415997
jsonitsac

Really HufPo? Just because some idiot has some axe to grind doesn't mean you have to pay him any attention.

6/24/2012 5:25:52 AM

#1415998
Leighton Buzzard

I knew it was a Poe when I saw 'flaunting'. I wonder, though, how many Ohioians signed up for the 'campaign'?

6/24/2012 5:27:10 AM

#1416002
D Laurier

wtf?

6/24/2012 5:38:24 AM

#1416014
Raised by Horses

If you have an issue with the tree, take it up with said tree's Intelligent Designer.

6/24/2012 5:59:38 AM

#1416020
Doubting Thomas

So... he was OK with it until he found out that buckeyes have bisexual flowers?

Aren't most flowers bisexual anyway? They have the male part, the stamen which holds the pollen, and the pistil which receives the pollen.

OK, so this is a poe, but I wouldn't put it past fundies to get their panties in a wad about this, since anti-gay sentiment is at a fever pitch with them these days.

6/24/2012 6:39:20 AM

#1416023
Brendan Rizzo

PLEASE be a Poe. No one in a civilized country could possibly be so ignorant. I don't want to see any more proof of the absolute failure of America's schools.

Does anyone wanna bet that the Ohio state assembly will do what he asks?

6/24/2012 6:46:00 AM

#1416024
rageaholic

So glad it's a poe!!!

6/24/2012 6:46:19 AM

#1416043
Horsefeathers

Jim, lighten up. It's a tree, you idiot.

6/24/2012 7:05:01 AM

#1416045
finnugold

This can't be real. Most plants have organs for both producing pollen and receiving it. Also, "male, female, and bisexual"? As if bisexuality is a third sex?

6/24/2012 7:07:22 AM

#1416062
Thinking Allowed

Just admit it Jim, you ain't homosexual and you think "Gays are icky."

6/24/2012 7:30:13 AM

#1416088
Papabear

[b]Well, how 'bout if we keep the name "Buckeyes" for Ohioans, but we change what we call you to "asshat prick?"

6/24/2012 8:03:28 AM

#1416091
Berny

Nobody is that stupid, are they?
Did anyone tell this retard that plenty of plants are bisexual?

6/24/2012 8:06:58 AM
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