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#1417458
Skyknight
I think Schlafly's point here is that Tebow's status as an exemplary (of some sort...) football player is supposed to have made Colorado's denizens want to emulate him. Piety included. But with Manning to be extolled instead, the piety is thought to be doomed to drop. And apparently, that's supposed to make it more likely that Obama will be voted for than Romney.
And yet, Obama IS a Christian. So he DOES have at least some measure of piety. This is no time to be playing holier-than-thou, Schlafly...
6/28/2012 9:22:15 AM
#1417470
Well, it's obvious that Tebow's pregame prayers aren't effective: it seems that God isn't as impressed by false displays of piety as the likes of Andy Schlafly.
As an atheist, I do not know how one has a "personal relationship" with ones deity, but it's most likely not attained in front of millions of people.
6/28/2012 10:03:43 AM
#1417476
anevilmeme
Seriously, at this point if you were to secretly swap Conservapedia and the Onion would anyone notice?
6/28/2012 10:14:37 AM
#1417480
Ludd
LOL. This idiot gets funnier every day. When has Tebow ever done anything other than cry and praise Jebus? I love that they think that everything that ever happens in society is part of some vast conspiracy against their heroes.
6/28/2012 10:21:10 AM
#1417489
The other white meat
On an unrelated note, Obamacare was upheld by the Supreme Court today.
A little FYI in anticipation of the flame war/shitstorm that's probrably going to follow here on FSTDT/CTSTDT/RSTDT.
Thank You. :)
6/28/2012 10:42:08 AM
#1417496
pete
I don't know, or want to know, what Phyllis did to the young Andy but she belongs in prison.
6/28/2012 11:50:57 AM
#1417504
breakerslion
Andy, please consider giving blood. Five quarts should just about atone for all the oxygen you've wasted.
Andy Schlafly: Completely indistinguishable from a shithouse rat.
6/28/2012 12:21:19 PM
#1417506
Mad_Jester
Because secular talent is a conspiracy to oust God-bothering mediocrity. In an attempt to control the outcome of a completely unrelated matter.
Man, thems is good shroomies.
6/28/2012 12:29:33 PM
#1417513
checkmate
If Colorado is God's chosen state, then why is it presently burning to a crisp?
6/28/2012 12:49:15 PM
#1417518
TheJebusFire
6/28/2012 1:03:55 PM
#1417519
Night Jaguar
Andy looks more and more like someone used the dark arts to make a real Stephen Colbert. However, dark magic always has unpredictable result. The result of bringing the fictional conservative pundit to the real world was this grotesque creature.
(I can't talk about sports since my knowledge of them is next to nil. Enough to recognize this quote is really silly, though.)
6/28/2012 1:06:45 PM
#1417523
JohnTheAtheist
Hall of Famer vs a Never Will Be.
Andy, your assholery just reached a new plateau and I didnt think that was possible.
6/28/2012 1:17:41 PM
#1417542
Old Viking
Colorado's vote is influenced by quarterbacks.
6/28/2012 2:16:07 PM
#1417544
Papabear
Tim Tebow has a leadership position in Colorado?
P.S. At least Peyton Manning has something from which he CAN be washed-up. Andy's just a wannabe, who's a has been before he's been.
6/28/2012 2:22:11 PM
#1417551
Passerby
The stupid, it pounds as a hammer in my brain!
The hypocricy, it burns as lye in my eyes!
The irony, it explodes as laughter in my guts!
6/28/2012 2:42:43 PM
#1417552
Zagen30
We don't know if Peyton's washed up or not. Two seasons ago, he was 2nd in the league in passing yardage (by 10 yards, which for those of you who are not American football fans is negligible), touchdowns, and completion percentage, and actually led the league in completions. So, you know, still one of the top 3 or so QBs. Last year he was out because of his back issues. This year? Who knows.
It's a bit rich to say that the liberal media treated Peyton like the second coming, when all the fundies were obsessing over how Tebow threw for 316 yards in his lone playoff win to date. I especially loved how they were further having their heads explode over the fact that his yards per completion was 31.6 (he completed 10 passes), because I'm sure to most of them it was completely new information that if you take a number and divide it by 10 all you do is move the decimal point left one digit.
I like their current inclusion of Manning's regular-season accomplishments (4 time MVP, 6 time AFC player of the year, 11 time Pro Bowler) when a player with similar credentials whom conservatives presumably love gets no mention (Brett Favre, 1 time Super Bowl winner, 3 time MVP, 5 time NFC player of the year, 11 time Pro Bowler).
I love how with David Beckham they don't even know what his political leanings are. Something tells me that if they find he's actually conservative enough he'll magically disappear from the list.
Oh, and Kobe being less valuable to the game of basketball than Jeremy Lin is just downright gut-bustingly funny.
6/28/2012 2:43:37 PM
#1417557
Dewey Cheatham
Concur with the notion that Mr. Schlafly is suffereing from pregressively odder delusions.
Although "Timmy" was a tremendous QB in college (1 Heisman, 2 NC rings), he's been shown to be mediocre with occasional (at best) flashes of greatness. His post-college career so far has been as much a by-product of the aggressive marketing carried out by the Focus on the Family crowd as his ball skills. May yet become a great NFL QB, or be relegated to a footnote in 3 years, it's too early to call.
On the other hand, P. Manning's NFL creds over his career leave Tebow in the dust. PERIOD. No aggressive marketing needed, we'll be hearing Peyton speak from the rostrum in Canton one of these summers.
Besides, don't most FB players tend to haveconservative, rather than liberal, leanings??
It really WAS about the football, regardless of anyone's borderline conspiracy theory to claim otherwise.
6/28/2012 3:07:03 PM
#1417559
Iczer-four
6/28/2012 3:22:20 PM
#1417560
Meeeh
Oh look! It's Andy Shitfly!
Nobody takes anything coming from that day-old puke of a man seriously!
6/28/2012 3:23:16 PM
#1417561
Alencon
I see Andy knows about as much about sports as he does about science.
6/28/2012 3:24:00 PM
#1417589
jsvenier
As a life-long Patriots fan, I can't stand Peyton, but this is the most asinine thing I have ever heard... along with the fact that Tebow can be a starting NFL QB... Besides we all know Brady is the second coming...
6/28/2012 4:55:12 PM
#1417604
Raised by Horses
@anevilmeme
Schlafly is The Onion's head writer. They pay him a stipend in exchange for hammering away at the keyboard in his usual fashion, then post it on their website under pseudonyms. Saves them a lot of work.
6/28/2012 5:53:11 PM
#1417608
derpmaster
there's actually a very complicated reason for this:
peyton manning is one of the greatest quarterbacks ever. tim tebow, on the other hand, sucks ass and is currently backing up another third rate quarterback on the jets.
6/28/2012 6:29:32 PM
#1417609
Mystical Chicken
Another doesn't-follow-football-closely person here. I had gotten it into my head that Tim Tebow was some sort of exercise guru or something. :p
6/28/2012 6:31:23 PM
#1417610
Agahnim
Christians found Tebow's obnoxiousness annoying, too.
6/28/2012 6:34:14 PM
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