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Quote# 94009

A Romanian lawyer is suing his local Orthodox bishop and four priests claiming they failed to properly exorcise flatulent demons that were forcing him out of his home.

Madalin Ciculescu, 34, accused the five of fraud after they turned up several times to exercise the demons which were responsible for the bad smells that were ruining his business.

He claimed that after the failed exorcism the demons even started haunting him at his home at Pitesti in Arges County in central Romania.

The man produced his mother to back up his claim saying that even the hair-dryer was possessed and a black shadow came out of it when anyone tried to use it - and she also said the fridge was infested by the flatulent demons that she confirmed left foul smells about the property.

But the lawyer for the Archdiocese from Arges, Anton Alin, rejected the allegation of fraud saying that the exorcism had been properly carried out and they believed the allegations of further demons and more bad smells were simply a product of the man's imagination.



Madalin Ciculescu, Daily Mail 48 Comments [4/29/2013 3:14:04 AM]
Fundie Index: 38
WTF?! || meh
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John

Yeah, but did the bishop and priests try the Febreze exorcism ritual?

4/29/2013 10:53:54 AM

Flah

I think a less expensive thing to do, rather than an exorcism, is to repair the motor on the hair dryer, get some Arm and Hammer for the fridge, and possibly invest in some Febreeze for the rest of the property.

4/29/2013 11:05:59 AM

Lacan

Seriously dublew tee eff. Are we sure this story is not from the 1800's?

On the other hand it is Daily Fail.

4/29/2013 11:20:54 AM

Anon-e-moose

'There's a sucker born every minute'

-PT Barnum

...meanwhile on Planet Reality in the 21st Century, dieticians recommend an increase in intake of easily-assimilatable foods high in carbohydrates, such as potatoes, rice, lettuce, grapes, bananas & so on. Also charcoal tablets and/or pharmaceuticals such as that known as 'Beano' (no, not the comic!).

I guess that's why the rest of Europe is so secular, Mad-alin. Science - especially medical will do that to a landmass's population. Something todo with the filling of things called 'Gaps' in human knowledge.

You could always take Garlic to ward off the Vampire demons eh Gigglescu...?! It'd certainly keep away the Pointing & Laughing Demons! [/hyper-sarcasm]

4/29/2013 11:40:43 AM

GigaGuess

Wow...just...I mean this is just...

Wow...

4/29/2013 11:42:18 AM

freako104

Wow.This is just wow.

4/29/2013 12:23:41 PM

Old Viking

The affliction can also be disconcertingly noisy at times.

4/29/2013 1:30:16 PM

Xotan

@ Old Viking

I think you have just explained away the polltergeist phenomenon! LOL

4/29/2013 1:37:46 PM

Hasan Prishtina

Folk religion at its finest. There might be other causes to consider.

4/29/2013 2:35:17 PM

Sammettik

In ancient times people actually did believe in fart demons.

Nowadays it seems they're a scapegoat for people who don't want to admit to being bad housekeepers.

4/29/2013 2:54:25 PM

Homeschool Hero

Flatulent demons? Must've gone to Taco Bell for dinner!

4/29/2013 3:07:57 PM

tracer

Bacteria are too small to see. Therefore, they don't exist. It's DEMONS that cause your old food to rot and smell bad!

Also, farts.

4/29/2013 3:15:55 PM

Mithras

Fart demons... definitely the best demon post since BOICE and BOYCE.

4/29/2013 4:04:39 PM

Horus

Am I the only one that feels bad for the flatulence demons? The must have gotten picked on at demon school by all the actually intimidating demons.

4/29/2013 4:28:21 PM

SpukiKitty

@Mithras

OMG! I vaguely remember BOISE/BOYCE! Forgot what the quote was about but yeah, that's an oldie but a goodie.

4/29/2013 6:08:08 PM

DFM

Well, we now know that the USA does not have the monopoly on idiots.

4/29/2013 8:33:46 PM

Einar

A Romanian lawyer is suing his local Orthodox bishop and four priests claiming they failed to properly exorcise flatulent demons that were forcing him out of his home.

Did they use Beano for the exorcism? If not, that most likely was Mr. Ciculescu's problem right there.

4/29/2013 8:42:36 PM

Tempus


A Romanian lawyer is suing his local Orthodox bishop and four priests claiming they failed to properly exorcise flatulent demons that were forcing him out of his home.




It actually works AND it's cheap.

4/29/2013 9:26:12 PM

JustinGG

Somewhere there's an Onion writer kicking himself because he didn't come up with this.

4/30/2013 3:51:15 AM

Pip

Maybe they should get a dog so that whenever they pinch their noses and look accusingly at each other they have something to blame other than demons. That's what happens in my family.

4/30/2013 7:31:43 AM



As an old joke says, cleaning would be a good way to solve the problem, instead of blaming the priests, I think.

5/2/2013 10:15:18 AM

Quantum Mechanic

Remind me to avoid Romania.

9/8/2013 8:02:18 AM

Uncle Steve

Clean out the fridge.

9/23/2013 3:52:23 PM
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