I got a question over at The Red Pill reddit, and thought it best to expand here. What is the Red Pill for women? A lot of it is the opposite of the feminist crap we hear in media and from our former hippy moms. So here’s my list, feel free to comment with any additions you may think of.

1) Our looks matter. Femininity attracts masculinity. Deep down we all know this, but sometimes the siren song of “Just be yourself! He should love you for you!” overrides something that seems so obvious. And sometimes it’s just plain laziness. See: all the women and girls who go shopping in pajama pants and flip flops. A Red Pill lady strives to always look her best, for herself and the gentleman whose arm she’s holding. She never leaves the house without makeup. She works out to keep herself fit.

2) We are aware of The Wall. We don’t stay pretty forever. Again, we know this deep down, but see #1. We are certainly aware of new grey hairs, new wrinkles, sagging skin. But movies and television tells us that it’s perfectly reasonable to expect to have a ton of guys chasing us in our late 30's/early 40's. Eat Pray Love, right? The Red Pill woman acknowledges this, and realizes that the grass is NOT greener on the other side once she’s married. “Leaving to find yourself” has dire consequences— As in, you leave to find yourself alone. Or with someone who is a severe downgrade. There is no rich, handsome doctor to attach yourself to. There is no happy ending to this scenario. But we don’t despair, because of Wife Goggles, and because of #1. We are MILFs because we make ourselves such. (Or Cougars perhaps, for those who choose the kidless route!)

3) Sexual promiscuity has consequences.When you’ve spent your 20's in and out of every bed in town, it makes having a happy, successful marriage very hard. If you happened to fall for one of those bad boys, and he set your Alpha mark at a very high level, the man you settle down with is screwed. He’ll never be able to live up to that ideal you’ve stored in your head. Not only that, but giving yourself to so many men dulls your ability to really connect sexually with another human being, and the sexual connection you share with your husband is important, perhaps most important. Because sex is what makes a marriage marriage, isn’t it? Without sex, marriage is just an expensive, complicated friendship.

4) We are emotional creatures. This can sometimes make us illogical. We tend to think with our hearts, and we’re encouraged to do so. How many times did we hear “Follow your heart!” when we were growing up? The “You Go Girl” mentality runs rampant. Red Pill ladies try to overrule their more whimsical desires to consider the consequences of following their heart. This ties in closely with #3.

5) We can’t “do it all”. When our moms told us that, they were setting us up for failure. No one can do it all. You cannot have enough time for both an overly demanding full-time career and a family. One will suffer. We have been set up for failure if we try. If your career can’t handle days off for sick kids, getting out early for snow days when school is cancelled, and a significant amount of maternity leave, you’re in for a hard time. See A Letter to my Daughter.

6) Men don’t WANT us to “do it all”. We’ve been told career is important, but men don’t give a lick if you’re an uber successful doctor if you’re at work 70 hours a week. In fact, it can be a detriment to the marriage. If you’re working so many hours that you can’t spend any time together, there’s no way that demanding job is a +1 in the “Awesome Wife” column. Red pill women realize that money and power from our careers don’t buy marital happiness. Sometimes a job is necessary given the circumstances, but it isn’t the necessity it’s made out to be.

7) Sex is necessary for marriage. If you fool around all through your twenties then settle down, you don’t get to cut your man off from your vagina without some consequences. There’s a fine line here that requires some communication though. The reason a lot of women end up cutting off the vagina-fun-zone is because they’re no longer attracted to their man. If that happens, it is absolutely a Red Pill Woman’s responsibility to initiate a State of the Marriage talk to fix it, if her husband hasn’t taken the initiative to do it himself. Follow the Two Week Rule.

8) Our men are our Captains. We voice our opinions, and certainly speak up if we think strongly about a particular topic, but the Captain has the bridge and makes the final call. This is a big, huge, sticky subject for most women. Hell, it’s still a sticky subject for me. But in terms of a dance, if both people are leading, you end up stepping on each others’ feet constantly. A dance only works when the man takes his woman’s hand, guides her body effortlessly, and she gracefully follows. He is conscious of every movement of her body, and she his. She melts into him and accepts his movements as her own. Her submissiveness and his dominance meld into a graceful, sensual display.

9) We are aware of hypergamy, and take these measures to counter it. We know the rules of attraction, isolation, and escalation. If we are married, we never allow ourselves into a situation where the second two can occur. Girls Night Out to the club is anathema. No lunch dates with male friends. We keep male “friends” at arm’s length, if at all. “It just happened” is never an excuse.

Note: I come at this angle from that of marriage and kids, so I’m leaving out some things when it comes to being single and not having kids. Obviously if two people don’t want kids (which is absolutely fine, no judgment from me), they shouldn’t have them, and a red pill woman would be all about carrying her financial weight with