Newly-wed Roman Catholic couples are being encouraged to say a special prayer together before having sex.
The specially-composed Prayer Before Making Love is aimed at 'purifying their intentions' so the act is not about selfishness or hedonism.
62 comments
{sweatdrop} I think you want to take a closer look at the Canticle of Canticles. Which part of it looks like it's meant to be strictly metaphorical, exactly? Even AS metaphor, it's not exactly denouncing sex-for-hedonism, at least not within married/engaged fields. (Yes, it's silent for outside those fields. But I'm trying to keep to that which even anti-Vatican II Catholics wouldn't bat an eye towards.)
wow. that's self imposed martyrdom at its highest. now they're turning on the one arbitrary way to fuck that they arbitrarily decided doesn't make Jesus cry. stop victimizing yourselves, assholes. or take it one step further and abstain from marital sex so you don't make a gaggle of kids who will do nothing but grow to resent you and take up space on highways
Remember, citizens, making babies is Our Duty To The Party ... I mean, Church. Join the Anti-Sex League today!
Well,
this prayer sounds rather harmless.
I wonder however, why only newly-wed couples should say this prayer...
do they assume, that couples that have been wed for a longer time automatically have sex only for duty and baby making, but not for fun, selfishness and hedonism?
What a creepy, sinister attempt by the uber-fundie Pope to psychologically manipulate the flock.....Make them feel so guilty about what they're about to do that they'll abandon their condoms and birth control.
After all, he's also informed African Catholics that it's not permissible for married men with HIV to wear condoms to protect their wives from infection.
Because heaven forbid you should enjoy having sex with your spouse on your wedding night.
No, let's up the ante with a little Guilt And Shame! Guaranteed to make sex awkward for both parties or your money back.
@Skyknight: The SoS never uses the word "husband" or "wife" in any translation I've ever seen. It's equally likely that the lovers are unmarried. Which only makes the hypocrisy worse.
I want to send memo to pope. It will read like this:
God made sex fun and usefull. Stop taking the fun out of it. You are messing with powerfull forces here. Forces you do not and never will understand. Stop it or else,
Your sincere lord
YHWH
Only a beggar would make charity a virtue, selfishness a sin, and pleasure a guilt-trip.
PS: "Catholic Truth" versus actual truth?
And it goes something like this:
"Dear Lord, bless this thy horizontal dance of love so that we may both enjoy the mattress mambo in thy good grace. Lord, my love sausage throbs with anticipation of entering my wife's honey pot that drippeth with thy hot, gooey pleasure. As we writhe with heavenly pleasure in the way of thy missionaries, or perhaps doggeth style, may we both praise your name as we cometh with spurts of thy holy spirit, Amen."
"We can't keep them from having sex by promoting the value of virginity anymore. We can't stop them with abstinence-only education because people realized it was stupid and didn't work despite our best efforts. What can we do to control sex now?"
"How about a special prayer for married couples?"
"Brilliant! Who wouldn't want to say a prayer disclaiming all pleasure from sex?"
Their desperation is reaching the level of mildly amusing. This, of course, will fail as badly as everything else they've proposed lately.
Fundie Beliefs #22 - Punishment
Everyone is a sinner who deserves to be punished by God. Although in theory there’s nothing you can do about this except have faith in Jesus and take what God gives you, there is one thing that it doesn’t hurt to try: punish yourself first. If you treat yourself badly enough, maybe God will let you off the hook for more serious things, like the Lake O'Fire. For example, you want to avoid enjoying music*, dancing, wearing pants (girls), drinking, having sex for other than procreation or anything else that might suggest to God that you’re actually enjoying life. Be careful about overdoing it, though. For example, giving your money to the poor or mowing the elderly Jewish neighbor's lawn for her is just showing off **.
* Even country music!
** If you’re a guy, you usually don’t have to stop watching football or NASCAR races or give up beer, biscuits and gravy or barbeque, either.
@ rubber chicken
Spit my drink out.
As a newlywed Catholic, I feel compelled to clarify:
The Pope had nothing to do with this and no one official is encouraging couples to say any prayers. This prayer appeared in a prayer book published by a Catholic publishing company. It has no endorsement from any Church official.
Quite frankly, our premarital class encouraged us to have all the fun we want and never mentioned prayer in the sex discussions.
Meshakhad: It's an attempt to pervert what is a perfectly earthly, mundane, normal, natural, and *necessary* act... into something that requires sanctification.
How much of your life do you owe your religion?
I... don't understand. The definition of selfishness is doing something that gratifies you at the expense of someone else. This only really works (and even then only a screwed up way) if you truly believe sex is not something two people do for each other, but a one-sided bargain where one performs for the gratification of the other. Even if its just grim humping with a view to impregnation, how is gratifying the man alone and/or starting a family (which is a personal want, not a need, though people often confuse the two) any less selfish than having enthuiastic sex?
“Newly-wed Roman Catholic couples are being encouraged to say a special prayer together before having sex.”
An organization of men in dresses who don’t fuck are telling me how to fuck? Fuck that.
“The specially-composed Prayer Before Making Love is aimed at 'purifying their intentions'”
She’s my wife. I haven’t slept with anyone but her. I haven’t TRIED to sleep with anyone but her since our first date. I think pure intentions are already in my wheelhouse.
“so the act is not about selfishness or hedonism.”
Yeah, i think we’re okay on that. Too old for hedonism. Maybe if we got our knees replaced…?
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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