(Thread: What would you like to be during the Millennium?)
I would also like to learn how to play the electric guitar better. I have played classical as a child and play a bass and sing now in our praise band at church. I never was able to learn the style of music I really love though and would love to just play for Jesus, just instrumentals to Him. Ohhhh, and I love white bangle tigers too, I want a couple of them roaming around the yard (or in my mansion, is shedding part of the curse that's lifted??? ha ha ha!). I want star gazer lilies and other sweet smelling flowers planted around like gardenias!!! Ooooo, and I want to host parties and feasts where I have just tables and tables of awsome food for everybody. oh oh oh, and I want a lake nearby so that I can walk along the floor of it and watch all the fish swim by me.... I will need a few dolphins too please.... Has anybody thought about what an awsome wardrobe Jesus will have for all of us??? No hand me downs!!!! No worn out clothes for the bride of Christ! We are royalty! Everything that belongs to Jesus, belongs to us!!! We (no pride here) will be decked OUT! We will actually be able to handle the position and blessing then, no flesh to contend with. Man, I CAN'T WAIT!!!! My heart is already there!!! I want to see Jesus and be with Him forever. That alone would fill me to overflowing for eternity, but we are so gonna party too! What a celebration!
74 comments
I wonder what will happen when they find out the dress code:
No jeans.
Waist bands have to be at your waist, not down around your cheeks.
No showing your underpants.
You have to wear your baseball cap with the visor forwards.
No Abercrombie & Fitch or Juicy.
No flip-flops, Nike's or other athletic shoes - lace-up leather (with dress socks) only.
No band tee shirts, college sweats or hoodies.
These people really just want to reincarnated as demigod level celebrities with the most decadent of lifestyles, mixed with ready access to beautiful natural scenery as well. They don't want spirituality. They don't want paradise. They want to get some shiny objects, some parties, and an undue level of importance, with Jesus as their sugar daddy.
They want to make their passage through the Pearly Gates to be the beginning of a magical episode of "My Super Sweet 16". It sickens me...so much...
You know, that threat didn't make me recoil in disgust as a lot of RR threads do. It's sort of sweet, like watching little kids list what they'd buy if they had unlimited money, or what they'd do if they could do anything. The only odd part is that they actually believe this will happen. Still, even mainstream Christians believe in heaven. And this isn't hateful or bigoted. I can't bring myself to call this fundy.
If Jebus wears an Armani suit, gets a haircut, loses the beard and brings only the finest babes to my mansion parties, I'll consider worshipping him.
We'll sip scotch by the koi pond and chuckle over blue jokes whilst puffing on our pipes as the dolphins leap across the face of the moon. And the rest of the Rat Pack will look upon us with awe.
It'll be swell, dig? Natch.
well, at least you still have your imagination. :-)
Although I find it ironic that your ambition is to be treated like royalty when you are supposed to be trying not to be 'worldly.'
During my 72 years in this lifetime, I have been in a state of clinical death twice and I'm not afraid of the third.
All I can tell you is to prepare yourself for the biggest imaginable disappointment you've ever had, or even better spend the remainder of your life well away from any church.
This is sad or pathetic fundie. It for sure isn't hateful.. But it's fundie all the same. She (I assume) is so looking forward to a material reward in the 'afterlife' that she doesn't want to live in this present world (I CAN'T WAIT!!!! My heart is already there!!!"). Wow, I feel dirty after having typed that out.
This is my biggest problem with Christianity. These are the people who enable the haters. They are so sure that this life is worthless that they don't bother to tell the haters that 'god' isn't about hate.
I read the thread: selfish, prideful, arrogant. They see themselves as rulers of the millenial world, teaching the poor left-behind mortals what is truth, while having mansions, and all the goodies this life hasn't given them.
Their imaginations are SOOO small: they talk about helping god (you know the omnipotent one) to rebuild the world, they talk of rifding, fishing, etc, etc. It would be blasphemous if it were true!
They expect heaven to be payback, and that's plain nasty.
This sounds like a little girl from a poor family, using the Rapture as an acceptable outlet for her Orphan Annie fantasies. "No hand me downs" and all that. It's just sad that anyone would raise a child to believe that the only way to a better life is Death by Apocalypse, rather than Job by University Education, for instance.
"We will actually be able to handle the position and blessing then, no flesh to contend with."
Er, no flesh? Why would you need an awesome wardrobe, then? Or feasting? Or an electric guitar? Or a mansion?
Confused or what?
fergus
Huh?
So you want to be rich and decadent?
I'm guessing that this girl lives in grinding poverty, In a trailer park in the bible belt.
She dreams of the expensive toys she sees on TV, But doesnt get the whole "Good Taste" thing.
well..I think this is rather sad. It makes me think of the old "It's easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter heaven" but yet the comments I've read and heard all deal with material riches as a reward.
Got to love the "we're gonna party" enthusiasm. All Disco.....
Aw. *Sniff* *Wipes tear from eye*
That was actually really cute... in a wide-eyed, child-like way. As the Telosians (spelling?) said to Captain Kirk:
"He has his illusion, you have reality. May yours be just as pleasant."
They are loving God and playing in a christian band because they wants to go to heaven, therefore they probably won't get to heaven. It isn't a love of God, its a love of paradise.
I like it when somebody messes up their religion.
Wow, materialism for Jebus. OnlyJesusSaves you shallow little whore. I hope you DO make it to Jebus' heavenly mansion in one of your coke trips and then Jebus and his drunk buddies gang-rape you with spiked condoms and when you go to God to tell on his son he asks Gabriel to kick your torn up ass to hell for false accusations, and as in real life your heart gradually comes to a stop because of an OD, in your dream you see yourself slowly sinking into the depths of hell, and THEN perhaps as you draw your parting breaths in the real world MAYBE you'd realise what a pethatically superficial life you chose to live and THEN OnlyJesusSaves you, in your hazy, rapidly darkening mind, will repent, but by then it'd already be too late. Now how do you like THEM dolphins bitch?
One shouldn't go on the Internet so soon after smoking pot or sniffing glue. Seriously, so much delusion packed into one paragraph.
Mind you, the only way you can hope to see Jesus is to be stoned out of your mind, because it isn't going to happen any other way.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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