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Quote# 65955

Newly-wed Roman Catholic couples are being encouraged to say a special prayer together before having sex.

The specially-composed Prayer Before Making Love is aimed at 'purifying their intentions' so the act is not about selfishness or hedonism.

Catholic Truth Society, Ananova 61 Comments [9/29/2009 10:43:02 PM]
Fundie Index: 22
WTF?! || meh
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Secret Squirrel

It's the ultimate answer to the contraception ban. Guaranteed to make them lose their stiffies.

9/29/2009 10:44:38 PM

Skyknight

{sweatdrop} I think you want to take a closer look at the Canticle of Canticles. Which part of it looks like it's meant to be strictly metaphorical, exactly? Even AS metaphor, it's not exactly denouncing sex-for-hedonism, at least not within married/engaged fields. (Yes, it's silent for outside those fields. But I'm trying to keep to that which even anti-Vatican II Catholics wouldn't bat an eye towards.)

9/29/2009 10:57:38 PM

aaa

Nobody gives a fuck.

9/29/2009 11:02:39 PM

Freboy

Religion - taking the fun out of fun since 1000 BC.

9/29/2009 11:33:54 PM

Meeeeee

wow. that's self imposed martyrdom at its highest. now they're turning on the one arbitrary way to fuck that they arbitrarily decided doesn't make Jesus cry. stop victimizing yourselves, assholes. or take it one step further and abstain from marital sex so you don't make a gaggle of kids who will do nothing but grow to resent you and take up space on highways

9/29/2009 11:35:12 PM

rubber chicken

Dear God, Please let him/her be understanding when I reveal that I can only get aroused if smothered in grape Jell-o while wearing a Scooby-Doo mask, Amen

9/29/2009 11:42:44 PM

Wehpudicabok

@aaa:

Literally!

9/29/2009 11:47:05 PM



Well that takes the whole fun out of it doesn't it?

9/29/2009 11:49:21 PM

Nathan the Wise

Remember, citizens, making babies is Our Duty To The Party ... I mean, Church. Join the Anti-Sex League today!

9/30/2009 1:15:55 AM

MTammisto

Some catholics have a weird idea of foreplay, but what ever rocks their boat.

9/30/2009 1:58:58 AM

LM

While you're on your knees honey...

9/30/2009 2:24:13 AM



Complicating what nature makes easy. Please.

9/30/2009 2:28:49 AM

Orestes

And you better leave enough space for the Holy Ghost, you filthy harlot.

9/30/2009 2:34:18 AM

shykid

Personally I'll be praying you don't breed during that sex.

9/30/2009 2:34:55 AM

Eden

Well,
this prayer sounds rather harmless.
I wonder however, why only newly-wed couples should say this prayer...
do they assume, that couples that have been wed for a longer time automatically have sex only for duty and baby making, but not for fun, selfishness and hedonism?

9/30/2009 4:39:58 AM

Blaidd Drwg

These people are those who never got over the shock they experienced when they first discovered that their parents had sex more times than they had children to account for.

9/30/2009 5:07:20 AM

Argle Bargle

Translation: You're not supposed to enjoy it.

9/30/2009 5:23:03 AM

The L

Because heaven forbid you should enjoy having sex with your spouse on your wedding night.

No, let's up the ante with a little Guilt And Shame! Guaranteed to make sex awkward for both parties or your money back.

@Skyknight: The SoS never uses the word "husband" or "wife" in any translation I've ever seen. It's equally likely that the lovers are unmarried. Which only makes the hypocrisy worse.

9/30/2009 5:29:22 AM



What a creepy, sinister attempt by the uber-fundie Pope to psychologically manipulate the flock.....Make them feel so guilty about what they're about to do that they'll abandon their condoms and birth control.

After all, he's also informed African Catholics that it's not permissible for married men with HIV to wear condoms to protect their wives from infection.

9/30/2009 5:29:52 AM

Mister Spak

Sex isn't supposed to be fun. It's supposed to be for making babies.

9/30/2009 5:33:05 AM



Why the hell is anyone attracted to this religion!
It says any enjoyment you get out of life is evil and that god put you hear to suffer!

9/30/2009 5:40:44 AM

Blackvoice

If they do it to give each other pleasure, would that be selfless enough for ya? Because otherwise...

9/30/2009 5:48:29 AM

Hirsute_Nailbomb

and remember boys and girls, these are ADULTS believing in this nonsense and acting this way. it's so very sad to see people wasting away their lives on such superstitious junk. lose the freakin' woo already.

9/30/2009 5:49:53 AM

K T

I'll go them one better.....During!!!!

Oh god... Oh god.....OH GOOODDDD!!!

9/30/2009 5:52:47 AM

The FBI is controlling your thoughts via your toaster

This reminds me of a scene from the Simpsons when Flanders calls Reverend Lovejoy to confess that he had lusted after his own wife.

9/30/2009 6:42:49 AM
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